DOUBLE FANTASY

 

"I'm just sitting here watching
the wheels go round and round
I really love to watch them roll
No longer riding on the merry-go-round
I just had to let it go"--John Lennon

When I was a kid, as in junior high and high school, I had a fantasy.  No...not that kind!  It was, however, one that played over and over in my mind until it seemed almost true.  This fantasy involved me being a successful, published writer of fiction, driving a Jeep Wrangler, and living in the mountains with my outdoorsy husband and five--yes FIVE--kids.  I think this fantasy combined a number of movies and books I had enjoyed such as Spencer's Mountain (if you remember that one, it REALLY dates you).  The point is that this fantasy has lived in my heart and soul and mind for years.  I haven't given up on the part about being a published writer (guess I'd better get going, huh?), and I DO live in the mountains, but the rest of my fantasy has changed a bit.

 

Now, instead of dreaming I'm in my thirties with a busy lifestyle, I mostly want to stay healthy for as long as possible to enjoy the life I have been given in the past fifteen months.  I've had a bit of a scare with immobility with an injury to my right knee that started about six months ago.   I'm sure the aging process has contributed to this injury, but nobody seems to be able to pin down exactly what's wrong with it.  I've had one diagnosis of arthritis, another of  a sprained MCL and another honest physical therapist admits she isn't sure.  The short version of this saga is that I have gone from being able to hike, to walk whenever I felt like it, and to be pain free to dealing with at least minor pain and seriously decreased mobility on a fairly regular basis.  I've been assured that there's nothing fundamentally wrong with my knee joint, which is definitely a plus, and I'm currently going through a couple of weeks of PT to strengthen my quads and hip muscles so that I can better support my knee.  I recently had a cortisone shot which has tremendously, and I'm hoping the inflammation will stay down and I can recover completely, even once the shot wears off.  The bottom line is that this injury has made me wonder if I've squandered an entire year by not taking full advantage of my mobility when I had it. I had told myself that my 60s would be the decade when I'd enjoy hiking and exploring these beautiful outdoor spaces, and I did do some of that.  But now I hope for the returned strength and mobility to get back into the activities I enjoy so much.  Given the opportunity to heal and recover fully, I hope I would take better advantage of what I have.

 

Another way my fantasy has changed is that I've traded in the idea of a Jeep on a Chevy Silverado and a Casita travel trailer.  We have made pretty good use of the opportunity to use the Casita in the past year, recently having explored near Blowing Rock and Boone, and we are looking forward to two trips in the near future.  One is to northern Georgia, not far from home, for a four day trip with our friends Mike and Sue in one of the Georgia state parks near Helen.  Then at the end of September we're headed to New Hampshire and Vermont in Dora (the explorer trailer) to see the fall foliage.  I've never been up that way, and I do love fall colors, so I'm very excited about this trip. In our neck of the woods, we've had so much rain this summer that the "experts" warn that the fall colors may not be very good, but I'm hoping we see the Northeast at its best.  How bad can Vermont me in early October?  As for the Jeep fantasy, there's always the lottery!! 

 

 

My good friend Katy and I have agreed that if either of us wins the lottery, we'll buy ourselves AND the other one a Jeep. Works for me, and Katy, I'm still trying!! I do spend too much of my free time on Jeep Wrangler forums and websites advertising used Jeeps, so I can't honestly say that dream has did. It's not very practical, but then again fantasies aren't supposed to be, are they? I still like the look of the traditional 2 door Wrangler and would buy one in a heart beat if I could afford it (although the 4 door is probably more functional).  I may be almost 63, but I'm not too old to want to sport around with the top down!!

 

 



 

Although I didn't end up with the five kids I thought I wanted, I do have a loving family with whom I've been able to share many memories. This summer we were able to play host to my niece Laurie and her two boys. We celebrated Sam's ninth birthday at the top of Water Rock Knob, which was pretty cool, especially when the other sunset viewers all sang Happy Birthday to him.



Then in July my niece-in-law Ashley brought their two girls and her sister Travis to visit.  I had REALLY been missing Olivia and Jane Ashley, and I appreciate their mom taking the time out of her busy schedule to bring them up here.  I think they had a good time!  I was pretty gimpy while they were here, but Carol and I did manage to take the girls to Dollywood for some adventure and fun.

 

 

Other summer visitors included my friend Aimee Castille and her daughter Taylor, who came to visit with Jessica Matens.  Both these ladies were colleagues in the English Department at BRMHS and it was WONDERFUL to see them.  Again, I think they had fun.  We went white water rafting on the Nantahala (Jess and Taylor's first time), and did some shopping in Asheville and Waynesville and had some good porch time too.





Other notable visitors this summer included my two oldest and dearest friends, Annie and Brenda, who also visited in July.  Somehow we managed to let an entire week go by without me even getting ONE photo of all of us together. Rats!!  It must have been all that fun we were having that made us forget!  Carol's daughter Laura also came with her cousin Angie and her friend Amanda.  We really enjoyed their visit and hope they liked Ridgehaven well enough to come back and see us soon.

 

Yuri Weydling and her friend Mark stopped by for dinner one night when they were in the area. Again, I got a good fix of old friends from Baton Rouge.  Thanks for the Community Club coffee, Yuri!! 

 

 

 

I also got a chance to visit with two of my former students for a nice lunch at The Early Girl Eatery in Asheville.  One of my favorite restaurants and definitely two of my favorite people, Erin Mann and Kate Cronin.  These two put up with me for THREE--count 'em three--years in high school English, but somehow they managed to survive!

 

Well, after re-reading this post and seeing how many people we had come to visit us this summer (and I didn't even mention my brother Glenn and his daughter Katie who stopped in for a short visit), I realize that I have a NEW fantasy...to own a B&B in the mountains of North Carolina! 

 

Seriously, it's been a great summer, and with Labor Day weekend upon us, I admit I'm sorry to see it go.  Yes, my favorite season is right around the corner, but with LOTS of nice rain and temps usually in the 70s or low 80s, I have thoroughly enjoyed these past few months, in spite of my knee problems.  I hope to start substitute teaching on a fairly regular basis soon (my sub orientation is coming up week after next), so this life of laziness and carefree existence may be soon coming to an end.  Compared to full-time teaching at Baton Rouge High AND part timing as an adjunct at BRCC, how hard can that be?

 

I guess my fantasy world may have changed somewhat from when I was fifteen, but I'm pretty much Living the Dream right here and now.  I may not own a Jeep (yet), but I still believe in their slogan, LIFE IS GOOD!!

 



 

IF I COULD SAVE TIME IN A BOTTLE...

               A YEAR THAT PASSED TOO QUICKLY

It's been a little over a year since I retired and moved to Ridgehaven.  I arrived here, I believe, on June 8th, and here it is shortly after that.  This past year has been a near-perfect gift to me, and in some ways I mourn that it passed so quickly. 

When I moved, I gave myself a year to unwind, to get into the rhythm of the seasons in a new setting, to get acquainted with my "self" again.  I WISH  I could say that I've done lots of the things I said I wanted to do:  read the Bible more (I have some but not enough), journal every day (same thing here), exercise every day (NOT...although I have done some hiking and walking), lose weight (I have had some success in this area, but again not enough).  So rather than condemn myself for all the things I haven't done, instead I choose to celebrate what I have learned in the past year:

 

1.  Naps are not necessary when I get eight or nine hours a sleep at night.  When I was working two jobs, my "night's" sleep was usually broken up into five hours at night and then another two or three in the afternoon or early evenings if I could manage a nap.  For a couple of years, naps were almost impossible, and I think I was sleep deprived for years and years.  It did take me a while to catch up, but I can officially state that I am no longer sleep deprived. (Now, don't get me wrong... a couple of beers and a couch in the afternoons still have appeal.)

 

2.  It is not normal to sweat twelve months of the year.  I think one of the things I have enjoyed the most is the fact that the climate up here is so different from that of Baton Rouge.  Yes, we have a few warm afternoons when the AC gets turned on, but those are usually only in July or August, and it is often cooling down by four or five PM.  "Muggy" here means 55% humidity instead of 99%.  The past winter was very mild here, and I am probably going to be surprised some day when it snows two feet, but often it was warm enough to work outside, or to walk with a coat on.  (That's another thing...I actually bought TWO winter coats, not just light jackets.)  I love to wear cotton, and in Baton Rouge I wore it all year long.  The word "wool" has actually passed my lips in the past twelve months.  To be clear...I still prefer sweat shirts and sweat pants to ANY other clothing in the winter and probably always will.  Spring and summer here...well, I won't make you want to throw things at me and tell you about how  cool they are.  And we definitely won't mention the fact that I am in hog heaven during the fall.  My goodness!! They are just perfect.

 

3.  Birds other than sparrows, blue jays and mockingbirds exist. One of my greatest pleasures this year has been watching "my" birds.  I still don't know much about some of them, but I  enjoyed the nesting pair of bluebirds more than I could imagine.  Our friend JoPaula gave us a bluebird box last summer, but it was too late for them to nest when she put it up, so I was pleasantly surprised to see a pair raise a little family of five babies.  I sometimes tend to read too much, and I began to stress about predators getting the eggs or babies before they could fledge. Somehow, they managed to do just fine on their own, but I secretly believe it's because they knew I was on guard with my binoculars, watching out for them every day.  I am sad that they only nested there for one brood, but there's always next spring. We buy sunflower seeds primarily, and the gold finches, purple finches, tufted titmouses (titmice?), black capped (or Carolina?) chickadees, and cardinals all seem to love it.  I was excited to see some birds I've never seen before when they migrated through--the red breasted grosbeak.  They have some big honking beaks on them, but they are very interesting.  I also saw a few of the blue buntings, but they didn't stay long.  We bought a very nice pole to hang multiple feeders from, and since it's right outside the den window, we enjoy a variety of bird visitations all day every day.  It's also interesting to note the sounds since the doors are almost always open.  I'm hoping to get reacquainted with my owl buddies soon.  I haven't heard them calling lately, but I know they're around. Squirrels are smarter than they look.  Some of my friends have asked for updates on the squirrels. Well...the new pole for the bird feeders has a squirrel baffle on it, which does indeed baffle most of them.  Instead of eating me out of house and home, MOSTLY they graze off the dropped seeds (and the extras I give them on purpose).  However, there are a couple of Kamikaze squirrels who leap off the roof and try to grab on to the decorative top of the pole.  Sometimes they succeed and proceed to feed, but they aren't eating nearly as much.  I think I might just have to end the ability of those guys to reproduce and pass the knowledge on to their offspring...just sayin'.

4.  Some views I never get tired of. I still love our front porch.  I can sit for hours (and sometimes do), watching the shifting clouds and the patterns on the mountains.  Another view I never tire of seeing is the long distance view of Waterrock Knob up on the Parkway.  (It's my cover photo on Facebook, but I'll share it here).  I have also come to enjoy the sheltered view of the mountains and woods from our little "sunset terrace" Carol carved out of the tree line.  We have to constantly fight back the encroaching underbrush, but it's worth it.

 

I am still (thank goodness) amazed at how beautiful this area is.  The other day, when the fire was burning in Black Forest, near my brother's house in Colorado Springs, I got teary-eyed thinking about how sad it is to see beautiful areas destroyed by fire.  I wondered what it would be like to look out on this forested landscape and see sticks and black and ugliness.  Whether sitting on the porch, driving into town, or driving on the Parkway, I try to remember to thank God every day for this gift of beauty, serenity, and contentment.

 

5.  I miss my family and friends but am happy to have made some new ones.  It seems to have hit me hard lately how much I miss my family.  My nephew Greg and his family in Baton Rouge were the closest family I had (in geographical proximity), and although I didn't see them that much, I knew they were close.  I am feeling sad about the girls growing up so quickly, and me not being there to see their concerts and attend their birthday parties as I've always been able to do. My brother Sam in Natchitoches was within driving distance too, and I miss him and his wife.  My other brothers are farther away, and I don't see them as often.  It was wonderful having Glenn and his daughter Katie visiting for a few days this month, but I need to get to Austin to see them again soon.  On the other hand, I'm closer to my niece Laurie and her family in Nashville, and I look forward to their visit to Ridgehaven this week.  My Baton Rouge friends I keep up with on Facebook, but it's not the same as being able to go out to dinner.  Some of them come to visit fairly regularly, but again...it's not the same.  I am very excited about my two "oldest" friends (since 7th grade) coming to visit in July!!  We HAVE met some very nice people and have made friends with our neighbors Mike and Sue. But for me, I guess they are the only new friends I've made.  I guess I need to get out more.

 

6.  I don't miss teaching like I thought I would.  I DO miss my colleagues, and I DO miss interacting with my students, but I don't miss the grind of having to "perform" all day every day, of having to grade papers ALL the time, of putting up with bureaucratic BS, of grading papers ALL the time (yeah, I know I said that already, but I repeated it for emphasis).  I DO miss having the identity of Miss Parker, Baton Rouge High English teacher.  But I also find that I'm comfortable reverting to the somewhat introverted, frequently shy person I really am.  I hope to begin substitute teaching in the fall, so getting back in the classroom will be interesting, to say the least.  There's no place like BRHS though, and I know that.  But it was time to leave.  I have no regrets.

 

7.  North Carolina doesn't know good Tex-Mex food from squat.  Suffice it to say that I am still on the quest to discover a really good Tex-Mex restaurant.  There are some who THINK they serve good Mexican food, but they are imposters.  I'd give $50 for some good chicken enchiladas at Superior Grill, not to mention the frozen margaritas!!  That in itself might warrant a trip to BR soon!

 

8.  I love my life.  I am still trying to grow as a person, and I sometimes disappoint myself and those around me, but I still am more content than I ever dreamed was possible.  God has been good to me, and I am grateful on a daily basis for His blessings.

Until next time...and the Further Adventures of Donna Parker.

 

 

 

 

April come she will...

Along with April, Spring has come to Ridgehaven.   She's been tantalizing us for several weeks now, only to suddenly withdraw her warmth and send us more cold weather.  I'm a novice to these mountains, and I may be fooled again, but it "feels" as if she's here to stay.  Don't get me wrong--I have thoroughly enjoyed the leisurely pace of winter, but if it's Spring on the calendar, it needs to be Spring in reality.



We kept hoping for a "big snow" but were disappointed that we didn't get it.  By "big" I mean the 12 or 15 inches that fell two years ago, when we had first bought the place.  This year, it snowed for the first time in October and snowed last week, maybe for the last time this season.  For me, snow is still enough of a novelty that I get excited when it sticks, although I must confess that cleaning off the windshield of my truck last week was not fun, especially since the temperature  was in the low 20s.  I had an early appointment and did not get to enjoy the fun on the toboggan that Carol and Sue (our sweet neighbor) shared in my absence.   And, like most of the pitiful little snowfalls we had this winter, it melted in the few short hours I was gone.

We can be ingenious though, as evidenced by the fact that we taught two of Sue's grandkids the joy of "grass sledding" just the other day.  It's surprising how a plastic toboggan and a spray can of furniture polish can be almost as good--especially for kids from Florida who don't know anything about snow anyway.

I know spring is here because of some of the following reasons:

 

1.  I am already taking joy in the sound of the song sparrow in our front yard. Even now, I can hear his sweet voice.  I think he's sitting in the same tree, on the same branch as he claimed last summer.  It will be time for the hummingbirds soon, so I need to get my feeders ready for the early arrivals.  For the past few months, I've enjoyed the constant company of the messy titmouse, who takes the sunflower seeds and cracks them all over th porch, and his friends the chickadee. and the dove.  New to me this year was the dark eyed junko, and I love the timid little towhee.  The cardinals have been a constant, of course, as have the sparrows.  It makes my heart glad to see the colors of the goldfinch changing from their muted winter plumage to the spring greenish yellow that will make them one of my favorites all summer.

 

 

2.  My ongoing battle to keep the squirrels out of my bird feeder is intensifying.  I even have Carol joining in--the Daisy Red Rider BB gun is getting a workout.  As of this morning, however, they seem to be winning.  I have chased at least four squirrels away today, or maybe it's the same four.  Maybe they're just circling the house and coming round again from a new direction.  More likely, I think the are bringing their cousins who are still in town for Easter.  And they're getting smart.  All they have to hear is the rolling of the BBs down the barrel and they hightail it up the tree and out of sight.  I HAVE been known to stalk them, shooting at them until they run back into the woods, but I fear that when one of them is distracting me, four or five others are running to the feeder.  I KNOW that even as I write this, they are finishing off the remainder of those seeds...sigh.

 

3.   Color is bursting out all over, from the forsythia and the trees to the flower beds.  Actually, we've had flowers blooming for several weeks in the form of the wonderful daffodils that are ubiquitous up here.  Their bloom cycle is nearing an end, but the tulips are coming up, the forsythia is blooming its bright yellow, the weeping cherry is asserting its pale pink blossoms, and the hyacinths are blooming.  Recently we discovered the serviceberry trees with their white blossoms which appear early in the spring and are a common sight in the woods.

Here are a few bright patches of color I found on the property yesterday, including some cute little weeds.

 

Many of these lovely daffodils were originally on the property from the previous owners, and others we ordered from catalogues.  Carol has sworn me to secrecy regarding the newest arrivals, but here's a hint...it involved a deserted country road, a shovel, and a lookout.  Enough said.

 4.  We're both eager to get to digging in the dirt.  Carol has already planted (or more accurately has continued to plant) seeds in the vegetable garden.  That's her baliwick.  I like the flower garden better, and we're very excited about a new landscaping project that's underway.  We've hired a professional  design guy to help us with what we are calling the meadow garden, which is a spot of about 150x30 feet we are hoping to make beautiful as well as to eliminate some of the  mowing I can't do on that steep slope.  The design plan is well under way, with a great deal of input from Carol, and we hope to have it in by May.  We have done some heavy duty spraying to--hopefully--arrest the steady encroachment of the grass, the horrible vines and the woody stemmed plants that have thrived there for years in what we called "the thicket", if that tells you anything about what it looked like before we cleaned it out.  We seem to keep adding more places that need more care, but since Carol is the gardener who does most of the work, I can't complain.  It should be quite lovely when it's finished, and if I can contribute by holding the water hose and occasionally spraying, then I'm more than happy to do it.  Carol spent countless hours during the past few winter months pouring over information before making the selections for the shrubs and flowers we both like.  For someone who claimed to be technologically challenged when I first met her, she and my iPad have become good friends.  Carol has also begun her "woodland garden" and we have established a seating area in the woods.  Someday this area will abound with ferns, shade loving shrubs, and hostas.  Strangely enough, I find that I like this "sunset terrace" area almost as much as I like the porch.  It's a slightly different view and more cozy among the trees.

 

Speaking of flowers, we are leaving in a couple of weeks to go to a part of the Great Smoky Mountain National Park that's over in Tennessee called Cosby Campground.  They are having a wildflower viewing event, and we hope to get there a few days before the crowds.  It's a part of the park I've not been to, so I'm excited to see it.  Supposedly, it's more isolated and less traveled than some of the campgrounds, which I like.  It's not tourist season yet, but the GSMNP gets a lot of visitors, so I hope we don't have crowds.  I like crowds even less now than ever, now that I'm accustomed to the peace and serenity of  Ridgehaven.  We hope we aren't too early for the flowers, but in this climate one never knows.  I need to get Dora (my Casita travel trailer) unwinterized and ready for the trip, but that should only take a few hours and the weather is getting perfect for that.   Another summer camping trip we have planned is to see the synchronous fireflies in June.  Is that cool or what???

 

It's hard to believe we've been here through three seasons already.  These past ten months have been simply wonderful.  As I tell anyone who asks (or even those who don't) I have been happier in these past months than I ever dreamed was possible.  Retirement has meant the freedom to relax, to live life at my own pace, to reacquaint myself with pleasures such as movies and books, and to simply live in such a glorious setting that it takes my breath away sometimes.  Right now I can hear the tinkling of several windchimes as well as  the songs of the birds, and I know the sun is shining on  this beautiful mountain morning.  This new life has truly been a gift, and I can't wait to see what the next few months bring.  I hope they bring more guests, more hikes, more birdwatching, and THE FURTHER ADVENTURES OF DONNA PARKER.

 

 

 

AIN'T IT FUNNY HOW TIME SLIPS AWAY?

Three years ago today, at approximately 8:30 AM, my sweet Gladys passed from this earth into the hands of the Lord.  It's hard to believe that so much time has elapsed, but I think of her almost every day.  Her legacy will remain for many more years to come, not only in my life but in the lives of all of us she influenced.

 

Gladys Wilma Tarver Parker was 97 years old when she died.  To say that she had led a full life is true in many ways, but not true in other ways.  She had experienced many aspects of life and had seen  the world change tremendously, but because she grew up dirt poor, she had not been exposed to some of the things women of my generation and younger take for granted.  Maybe she never missed them and it's only me wishing she had been able to experience these things that makes me sad.  Mother was a very smart woman.  If she had had the opportunity to go to college, she would have been something to behold! As it was, she dropped out of school in the tenth grade (there were only eleven grades back then) to help her family.  She earned her GED much later in life, passing the test after being out of school for decades.  She realized only later that there had been a book she could have studied to prepare her for the test.

 

She was a caregiver all her life.  The oldest of ten children, she helped on the farm, taking care of her younger siblings and working in the fields.  Then she married and took care of her own family consisting of my dad, three boys and me, the last child.  In her old age, she cared for my father until he died.  I sometimes wonder what she must have thought about when she woke  up in the mornings after Daddy died.  Did she ask herself, "What do I do with myself today?" since all she had known was taking care of other people.  Probably not.  My mother was above all else practical.  I know there was no room in her life for self-pity.  She just did what needed to be done.  And for the most part, she took joy in doing it.

 

It was especially hard for this strong-willed, independent woman to face the reality of old age and move in with me.  She came to that decision on her own, although she did have some gentle prodding from me. When she was 95 years old, she suffered a TIA that was the final evidence my brothers and I needed that she no longer was able to live alone.   We let her arrive at the conclusion herself that the time had come, and, in her practical way, she did.  So, after almost ten years of living alone, in her own house generously provided by my oldest brother and his wife, she walked away from that life of independence and moved to Baton Rouge with me.  Yes, it was hard on her to leave some of her "things" behind, but she also must have known that was the beginning of her new life of dependence.  That recognition that she was no longer the strong one, the anchor, must have scared her tremendously, as well as the unknown of what the last part of her old age would bring. 

 

And it wasn't pretty sometimes.  Mom lived with me for about fifteen months, and the first months of that period were pretty good.  She was still mentally sharp and physically healthy, but she gradually fell prey to that silent, hateful, miserable son-of-a-bitch--dementia.Watching this intelligent, lively, sweet woman sink into fear and confusion nearly gutted me emotionally, and all I could do was stand by and watch as I held her hand.  As one of my friends once said of aging parents, "All we can do is provide them with love and cushion their last years with a safe landing."  I tried harder than I had ever tried at anything in my life to protect her from the ravages of this disease, but my efforts weren't enough.  I finally succumbed to the reality that I could not work two jobs and continue to take care of her at home, even with the most wonderful care-giver in the world that she had with her during the day. If only I had been rich and had the money for 24 hour care, I could have managed, but I didn't and I couldn't.

 

The day we had to put her in the nursing home was the worst day of my life.  It left a hole in my heart that has never healed and probably never will.  She had asked to "go somewhere" other than my home. She had begun to lose her spacial orientation and had become convinced that this was not our home, this was not her room, and subsequently refused to go to bed or to believe me when I tried to explain what was happening.  "I'm NOT crazy" became her mantra.  I see now that this was her worst fear--of losing not only control of her life but of her mind as well.  And, when she finally requested going somewhere else for a while, saying she couldn't stay in this confusing house that she had begun to fear, I took the "easy" way out and agreed to find her a place where she could "get better."  I will always blame myself for being so cowardly.  My friends and family tell me over and over that I was on the brink of exhaustion--emotionally and physically--and that I had done more than anyone could have expected, but it still felt like betrayal.  I suppose it always will.

 

As the days turned into weeks then months in the nursing home (fifteen in all), she gradually sank more and more into the hole of dementia.  My afternoons, evenings, and weekends were spent with her. I was determined that she should experience as little fear as possible during this terrifying time, so either I or her care-giver was with her all the time, except after she went to sleep.  Those months at the nursing home were some of the most character-building moments of my life, in ways that I could never explain.  As Bette Davis said, "Old age ain't for sissies."  Enough said about that time.  It will, however, haunt me until I die.  This was a time I couldn't

really share with anyone.  How do you describe such pain to brothers who are miles away or to friends whose lives go on undisturbed by these events?  Yes, I had a good support system, but I chose to keep much of the pain inside me.  I guess I'm my mother's daughter for sure, just doing what needed to be done in those months. I had once said that the thing I feared most in my life was the death of my mom.  By the time it came, I was grateful for it.  She--and I frankly I--had been released from an unspeakable horror.  And I know that her slow, lingering demise was easy compared to that of some people.  She didn't suffer; she wasn't in pain.  She just...disappeared in front of my eyes.  For all accounts and purposes, I had lost my mother months before she died, so her passing was not traumatic.

 

Less than a month after Mom died, we closed on this property we call Ridgehaven.  This symbolized for me the ending of one chapter of my life and the beginning of another.  Here at Ridgehaven, I think of Mom often.  When I feed the birds and rejoice in the delight they bring me, when I see the flowers bloom, when I realize how far I've come from a share croppers shack in Richland Parish, Louisiana, when I look around and see some of her precious "things" in my house, I think of my mom.  And I am grateful to God for giving her to me.  She has been my inspiration, my lodestone, my beacon of light.  And I know she smiles down on me from above.

 

Thank you, Mama, for teaching me what love is all about.  I love you, and I miss you terribly.

 

 

I FEEL PRETTY, OH SO PRETTY!!

LOOKING FOR FUN AND FEELING GROOVY!!THIS IS    WHAT WE DO FOR FUN AT RIDGEHAVEN!!

Well, we celebrated the New Year and are procrastinating taking down our Christmas decorations, and I can't get interested in reading today, so I thought I'd catch you up--briefly--on what the past few days have been like.

Katy Parker, fellow retiree, I'm thinking of you.  I'm still in my PJs at 3:30, and although I HAVE showered in the past two days, I have NOT styled my hair.  I'm looking good, let me tell you!!  So, to keep from having to see my wild, unstyled hair, this is my solution.  You can see that the new and improved look is definitely better than before, right?  You CAN see that, right?

My other form of entertainment has been taking shots at squirrels at my birdfeeder with my new Daisy Red Rider BB gun.  (I haven't shot my eye out either). I don't want to hurt the squirrels (yet), but they are piggies and  don't know when to stop eating.  As a result, my birdies are sitting around patiently (and hungrily) on the nearby tree limbs, hoping desperately that the piggy squirrels will stop chowing down on all the sunflower seeds.  Now I DID put out some ears of corn up AND some sunflower seeds of their own for the squirrels to eat, but their  little squirrel brains have generations of programming telling them that THIS feeder at THIS site is FREE FOOD for the taking.  They can be trained evidently, however, since they are getting good at discovering me as I creep out the door and position myself to shoot their little squirrel behinds.  (Don't worry, squirrel lovers, I'm not that good a  shot and generally just scare them away.)

Here I am today in one of my strategic positions. Note the hunter stance.  Note the lack of a coonskin cap and thus a reliable substitute.  Note the lime green t-shirt and the plaid PJs.  Note the pink socks.  Am I a vision of loveliness or what????

I have been practicing with a soup can set up about thirty yards away, and I'm getting better and better, so look out squirrels!! My brother Glenn would be proud of me, since he taught me to shoot a BB gun low these MANY decades ago.  ( I also have incriminating evidence of Carol shooting at the can too, but since she is the primary cook at this residence, I refrain from including it here.)

So...as my teacher friends post on FB about how horrible the in-service meeting was today, these are THE FURTHER ADVENTURES OF DONNA PARKER!!!